Seattle Drivers: You Suck (but it's cool, man)
I've lived in six different states and have never really been able to say I've been living life in the fast lane. But now that I'm in Seattle, I can officially hold that honor. Because compared to these people, I'm as agressive as New York cabbie with a suspended license, who still holds a grudge against pedestrians. Yes, that's me laying on my horn when you come to a complete stop in the merge lane. It's me riding your ass as you cruise around, stopping at every yellow curb to see if it's a parking spot. It's me who doesn't wait for you to gesture me to go at a four way stop sign because I know I can make it across faster than you can turn your head to look at me.
But something about these Seattle drivers, as much as I loathe them, has me feeling like kind of a little roadway Grinch.
Yesterday, for probably the fourth or fifth time since I've been living here, I got into a parking fight with someone. I had assumed most people knew the protocal for dealing with these sticky little situations: hornblowing, finger throwing, window rolling down, obscenity screaming, with the winner being whoever can whip into the spot first. A Seattle parking fight, in contrast, consists of me doing all of the above while the other person gives a friendly little wave, mouthes 'sorry' and drives off. Frankly, it's a little unnerving. I mean, who are these people who aren't willing to raise their blood pressure over a parking spot? Maybe, just maybe, I can stop getting so aggro over parking spots (doubtful, but either way, I'm sure my heart grew two sizes yesterday). Thank you Seattle drivers, god love ya, you're annoying little ways might just start to rub off on me.
But something about these Seattle drivers, as much as I loathe them, has me feeling like kind of a little roadway Grinch.
Yesterday, for probably the fourth or fifth time since I've been living here, I got into a parking fight with someone. I had assumed most people knew the protocal for dealing with these sticky little situations: hornblowing, finger throwing, window rolling down, obscenity screaming, with the winner being whoever can whip into the spot first. A Seattle parking fight, in contrast, consists of me doing all of the above while the other person gives a friendly little wave, mouthes 'sorry' and drives off. Frankly, it's a little unnerving. I mean, who are these people who aren't willing to raise their blood pressure over a parking spot? Maybe, just maybe, I can stop getting so aggro over parking spots (doubtful, but either way, I'm sure my heart grew two sizes yesterday). Thank you Seattle drivers, god love ya, you're annoying little ways might just start to rub off on me.
posted by ballin' on a budget at 1:25 PM
7 Comments:
You are a meance to the society no matter which state you live in. The "Horrah" you cause is not only constricted on the roads, just ask anyone who has tried to take away your drink, an hour after the last call. In contrast I find Seattle people to be a friendly bunch, perhaps bordering on Smurf-ish nonsense at times.
Anyways, I miss your crazy antics. In case you didnt know I have been told to stay in my "country of origin", so I am back agian with my fellow brownies, a lil earlier than i'd hoped....but such is life. I do miss all the badness that is a Dick's burger. Goodbye Beef, Hello Vegetable Curry.
Assham! I thought you were too busy lounging in the sun, being fed veggie curry by your Indian harem to remember us pale folk! We miss you!
nothing and i mean NUTHIN makes you more aggro than a passive seattle driver. i travel with them every morning on the express lane which has made me more angry than i ever need to be before 9 a.m. sucking crazy seattle drivers.... i need my meds.
Wait. There's another Indo in the mix? And he understands bad driving in a bad sense vs. just the way of life in the motherland?
Ballin', I hear ya loud and clear. I'm starting my own freeway. I'll send you a toll tag soon.
Bergs, I like you aggro. Don't go soft on me, please. That would break my heart. I love the finger throwing and foul-mouthed-ness that make you your sweet self.
You could always just do what I did: sell my car. But then in seattle that's kind of like a social death sentence, huh? (hence why i came very near to sticking my head in the oven at the Crosspoint Vista).
OK, keep your car. Stay sassy. Please. No head in oven.
Oh wow, you drive just like I do. I recently wrote a post about my own little road rage problem. I'm glad I'm not the only one.
I absolutely love it! Hahaha, i was laughing my ass off the whole time! Seattle drivers suck! Worst in the country, no doubt!
Great commentary, write more!
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